Getting Lucky in Kentucky

Obsessed

2011-09-22T14:30:00.001-04:00

Since I officially registered for the Hartford Half Marathon, I have become obsessed with running and numbers, like my miles, my pace, calories burned, etc. I check my dailymile.com multiple times a day, like its going to change, just to see where I'm at, and what I can accomplish. Right now, I'm obsessed with my ending mileage for September. I'm on target for a record month.

I'm scared shitless of the half marathon, and I'm not exactly sure why. I am succeeding with my long runs. I usually stop once, and my pace is usually on target. I think its the fear of the unknown more than anything. I'm also scared that the weekend before I'm headed to NYC for my mom's 60th and for some reason I believe that this is going to throw off all the training I have been doing. I also haven't followed a specific training plan. I've just been running 4 times a week, including getting up at 5 am at least twice a week to go to the gym before work, a long run on Saturdays and a recovery run on Sundays. If I don't get up on a planned day, I freak out but I know sometimes I just need rest and I know that I wouldn't have a quality run if I don't allow myself some downtime.

I'm already planning the whole experience. I've planned to take Friday off (the run is on Saturday). I do have traffic court on Friday morning, but after that I'm planning to head to Hartford so I can go to the Expo and get my number, etc. I haven't planned out my outfit or music yet but I do have 3 weeks to go. I booked a hotel, about 4 miles from the start. Usually I would freak out about the distance between the hotel and the race, but another friend and runner will be staying at the same hotel.

To my benefit, I am constantly asking people for advice. I know quite a few people that are active runners and I'm always trying to gain knowledge about do's and don'ts. My boss has brought me a ton of old running magazines and I'm always reading to see what else I could be doing or noting things I've already done. To say that training consumes your life is a bit of an understatement. I'm constantly freaking out about what more I could be doing, how much more I could focus on my diet. The one thing I haven't freaked out about is my alcohol intake. I've been so careful about how much I drink, its a bit ridiculous. I allow myself a glass of wine maybe 2-3 times a week, but no more. I know that drinking anything more makes me slow and I refuse to allow that to effect my long runs, or any runs at all.

I tried obsessing my weight, that didn't last long. I was competing in an office competition, but really weight loss and training don't go hand in hand. Admittedly, I lost 7 pounds, but gained 2 back. I definitely lost inches on top, and I've lost inches on my waist. However, the shear amount of food that I consume is ridiculous at times. Today especially, I've been eating all day constantly. This usually happens after a great workout or a long run, but sometimes I'd like to not be hungry all the time. I'm pretty sure my office mates think I have an eating disorder. I eat all day and I'm constantly going to the bathroom due to my water intake.

Happily, I did purchase 2 dresses that I never thought I could wear and they look really good. I'm happy that although my weight by number isn't exactly wear I'd like it to be, my clothes fit well and I don't have my usual gut. After the marathon, I want to continue with running, but I'd like to work on toning and triming the fat.

Only 23 days to go!

My First Half-Marathon

2011-08-17T09:03:00.003-04:00

So I'm pretty sure I will be running the Hartford 1/2 Marathon in October. Besides signing up, I've already started training and putting on more miles. I have plenty of time to go and my body seems to be handling the long runs well. I did my first run over 6.5 miles this weekend and ran 7.5 miles at 8:58 a mile. Not too shabby. I started off slower and let my body get faster over time. I think that's the key for me in making it through longer runs. Now, if I can just keep that mindset when it comes to a race.

This weekend, I am running an 8-miler. Its the 1st annual Little Lake Sunapee 8-miler. Although its a race, I don't intend to run it as a race. I'm going to use it as a training run. There is one big hill that I'm nervous about but other than that I think I'll be ok.

The office weight loss competition has been going well. It's been a balancing act. I did gain in one week, but I'm still down over 3 pounds. 3 pounds isn't a ton but I don't intend on losing 30 pounds either. I'm looking to stop at around 10 pounds.

I am allowing myself to think negatively during races, which is having an effect on me. I need to refocus my energy on speeding up and believing I will get thru it rather than allowing myself to think I wouldn't.

I Always Do This...

2011-07-21T10:09:00.003-04:00

I abandon my blog for months and then attempt to reclaim it only to abandon it again in a few weeks. Admittedly, while I love the practice of law, I also hate it. Why you ask? Because I have no life. I leave the house every morning by 6:45 am and don't get home until at least 6. I never make time to run and in return, I don't feel good about my weight or the shape I am in. Our weekends have also been consumed with social plans, as well as working on the boats. Its never ending, but I guess that's life. This weekend, I have no plans, which is nice, including no work.

This week, I have been determined to get back on track with running and dieting. The office started a weigh-in so that's definitely helping knowing other people know where I am with my weight. So far this week, I've put in 10 miles, I've definitely been a lot more careful about what I am eating, as I've been weighing in on my own. I was so comfortable with my body last summer, I want to get back to that point. I know I can, I just have to put in the time and effort.

I just checked my dailymile account because I am obsessed with mileage and time. I've run 417 miles since last September. I've won my age twice in the last two of three races. My next 5k is the Cigna in Manchester. My plan is to break into the 23:00s if I can keep up with the running and pace for the next few weeks. I had set my mind on doing an 8 miler in August, however, I don't know if its a good idea since I haven't been training for long runs. We'll see what the next few weeks bring and I just may decide to do it.

Running Coach

2011-04-14T14:46:00.006-04:00

Seriously, I have a running coach, and the best part - he's free! Right before I started working at my new firm, one of the partners googled me and found out that I run. He's also a runner and loves to run every day. So it's been his mission since I started here to make me a better runner. I really appreciate his efforts, and even though he annoys the crap out of me, he pushes me. He makes me run when I don't want to, he makes me run harder than I'd like and I've gotten better. When I run by myself, I push but I don't push to the point that I can't breathe and don't feel like I can push any further.

We usually run before work, which lapses into work time, but apparently that doesn't matter to him. I mean he's my boss so as long as he's ok with it and I get my work done, I really make out in the deal.

I've got my first 5k of the season lined up for next weekend. I haven't found anyone to run with me yet, but I am sure I will. Matt wants to do it but without knowing his work schedule, its hard to plan for next weekend. My goal would be to break out of the 24:00 minutes, however, it my first race of the season so I don't want to kill myself in the process.

Catching up

2011-04-13T12:00:00.007-04:00

Its been sometime since I've really taken the time to update everyone on my happenings. So to start (which I mentioned in my last blog), I've met someone incredible. Matt and I met on plentyoffish.com the day after Thanksgiving. I mentioned that I was a runner, and he in fact looked me up. He figured out that we had run together in the same 5k and I had beat him by 11 seconds. We ended up meeting a few days later at a local bar. We were both quiet and shy but tried hard to have a conversation. It was clear we were both scared and hesitant. Interestingly enough, we befriended someone at the bar, who was new to the area, and he bought our beers. We chatted very little the first week, except for a few texts. We had our second date on a Friday and we went to Margaritas. Concord had also shut down Main Street and was having a bit of a winter festival so we went to that as well. We grabbed a few beers after dinner and that was that. He drove me back home and I remember chatting in his car. I said "good night" and he simply touched my knee and said something. I don't remember what but I think it could have been "good night." The next night we went out on our third date, to the Appleseed. There was a band playing. Matt secretly invited his boss and his girlfriend to join us. Again we got free drinks (there was a pattern going there for a while). He coyly said to me: "I'll show you my house tomorrow if you show me your apartment tonight." He was so smooth about it, it was pretty funny. I knew though that I didn't want anything to happen; I didn't want any sort of relationship solely based on physical intimacy. So I led him up to the 3rd floor and showed him around. I remember pointing and saying "that's my bedroom" but I don't think I ever actually showed him. We were chatting, standing in the kitchen and he said "do I get a good night kiss?" If you can imagine, he was trying to be so smooth and cavalier. We kissed and almost couldn't stop. He remarked that I liked kissing and after a few kisses he said he didn't want to leave, but we both agreed he was going home. Since then we've been pretty much inseparable. We spend a lot of time doing activities together: running, skiing, grooming, grocery trips, home depot adventures and the sort. We really enjoy each other's company and usually spend a fair amount of time laughing together. In the past month, I've also moved and started a new job. On my advice, don't ever try to do them both at the same time, its disastrous. I was a stress ball for weeks and it really wasn't worth the insanity. Either way, I'm happy with both decisions. I've got a much bigger, nicer apartment. There's more space, its more organized (or will be eventually), and there's a potential of a pet now. Matt spends most nights at my place so having more room is also a bonus there. My new job is AMAZING! While I haven't been able to dive in fully yet, its real lawyer work. I have clients, I'll represent them in court, and the paychecks are livable. The partners and associates are great and its not a sham either! The commute is an hour in each direction, but I don't mind the drive and I enjoy the time (usually). Life is pretty good right now. I feel like I'm finally growing up and making some serious progress in life. Running will kick up again soon, I'm currently fighting a nasty cold. My plan is to run a 5k every month for the rest of the year. I already have a bunch lined up. Hopefully I can convince myself to eventually run something further, but we'll see how I progress with training.

The Next Sarah Palin?

2011-03-01T10:30:00.000-05:00

I don't think so, but I have decided to embark on a political career. A few weeks ago, Big Pete mentioned to me that Town elections were quickly approaching. He told me that the seat for Town Moderator was open and suggested I run for it. This was Wednesday night, he told me I needed to sign up for candidacy by Friday. So I had little time to think over the decision.

On Thursday, I placed a few calls and asked advice from a few people, but by Thursday afternoon, I figured I should at least make the effort to try for it. So I am officially on the ballot as a candidate for Town Moderator.

Now you're probably wondering, "what is a town moderator?" Essentially, the Moderator runs the Town and special meetings. They keep meetings in order, tell people when it is their turn to talk, not talk or when a vote needs to be taken. Most of the rules for Town meeting are based off Robert's Rules of Order. Fortunately, during my time at Hillsborough County, I have provided a few legal opinions based upon these rules, so I know them quite well now.

When I signed up to run, I didn't ask if anyone else was running. It now turns out I do have opposition. I'm not scared or nervous about the opposition. The only thing I do happen to be scared about is actually taking on the role.

I think this will be a fantastic experience, no matter what happens. I've always been very opinionated and interested in town politics, so I figured it was about time I let the curiosity get to me and make a move. I have created a facebook page as a way to publicize my effort so we'll see if that pays off in the long run.

I've also been inspired by a friend to get back on running. I took the entire month of February off due to insane work hours and high stress. The running would have helped me de-stress but finding the time to run probably would have killed me. So as of today, March 1, 2011, the running begins again. I'd like to run a 5k every month for the rest of the year, aiming for a half marathon in September/October. Even though I've only gained a few pounds (not even 5) since I haven't been running, I am not at my healthiest. Its not just about the numbers its about how you feel.

I haven't been inspired just about running, but in life generally. One of the greatest friends that I have from college, Jenn, is also a blogger. Just yesterday she wrote an awesome blog about balancing life, running, dieting, etc. It really inspired me to make the time to get back into balance. Its really draining when I don't make enough time for myself; I get tired more often, I'm more irritable, and generally more anxious.

Also since my last post, I met someone. Interestingly enough my last post was about the Turkey Trot. I did pretty well during that race, not my fastest, but not my slowest. More importantly is the guy who finished 11 seconds behind me (its still a running joke between us- sorry for the play on words). I didn't know him at the time but four days later we went on our first date, after meeting online. I remember seeing him at the race right after I went through the finish line while they were taking my number, but given the weather and the hill during the race, I was more focused on catching my breath, than I was trying to find a date, at the time. We've been inseparable since. More to come on him when I have time, but I'm glad to report that I am happily in love!

Sunapee Turkey Trot!

2010-11-30T10:45:00.004-05:00

Another fantastic race for me! I ran the Turkey Trot on Thanksgiving morning with about 800 other people from the area. It was a good run with a challenging beginning.

The first third to half mile of the race was up a very steep incline. I kept my head down and just focused on keeping a good pace for myself. I passed a few people on the hill. I don't think a lot of people were prepared for the intensity of the hill. However, since I moved so well up the hill, a lot of people ended up passing me on the way down or throughout the rest of the race. I finished 99th out of 813 runners, with a time of 24:34. Not my personal best, but still good considering. I finished 6th for women in my age group too.

A lot of the Fentons ran/walked the route too. Pete and Kyle both completed their first 5ks with good times.

I've started tappering down on my running. I've taken 2 days out a week to do Zumba instead. It helps with the cold weather, and I find my muscles like the change. I'd really like to run a half marathon in the spring. I'm going to start looking for a half marathon and start a schedule of distances I'd like to accomplish each week. I am also hoping that with winter picking up the various sports will help strength my muscles for a longer run.

My First First

2010-11-02T10:22:00.004-04:00

I am happy! And I'm proud to say that my happiness has been self derived. Life has been good. Work has been busy. And running has been great.

My latest race was about a week ago. It was another local fun run. It was a brisk Saturday morning, approximately 30 degrees when I left the house at 8 am. The race was taking place about 5 miles away. When I got there, no one else was around so I was afraid I had gone to the wrong place. After a few minutes, people started arriving, however, it wasn't very many people. Actually only 4 people ran the race. I guess that's what you get for small towns. I think more people would have run, except the route was right on the lake and the wind blowing off the lake made the temperature about 25 degrees. So I ran in full gear. Winter hat, running gloves, pants, three layers and a jacket. All running appropriately gear (wicking, etc.) but my face remained cold the whole time.

So the four of us took off. We stayed together for a few minutes and then two of us broke off ahead. I stayed behind the only other female running until we hit a hill. She slowed down. Since I've done quite a bit of hill running, I knew I could push ahead on the hill, and taper off coming down. I passed her, but I knew she wasn't far behind. I kept up my pace, but eventually I heard her behind me. Since I let someone pass me in the last race, it wasn't about to happen again. So I pushed harder than I ever have probably. I finished first out of all 4 people. My time was 13:37. After I finished, I tracked the distance of the run and it was 1.8 miles. It definitely wasn't the 5k I had signed up for but I was happy for the first.

The next run isn't until the Turkey Trot on Thanksgiving morning. I'm pretty stocked for the run, and I'm hoping in that time I'll have a faster pace for races. Right now, I am staying pretty steady at an 8:30 mile for most runs, short and long.

This weekend will be an exciting time. My Mom and Dad fly in Friday for my swearing in. The last time I saw them was Christmas and since then my Mom and I have both lost 40 pounds. She'll be staying with me for a few days while my Dad visits the rest of the family in Mass. We have a lot planned, so it'll be jam packed but definitely still fun. My swearing in is Tuesday. I'm actually getting sworn into the NH bar and the NH federal bar. Two different bars, but only one test. After that, they'll fly out Tuesday night. I'm pretty sure I'll be quite exhausted after all that but I'm excited just the same.

I'm also happy to say in what has seemed like chaos, I feel like I've finally figured out my social groove up here. Hanging out with new people and getting out more. Its been nice, and I'm hoping to keep it up.

Grantham Run for the Rec 5k!

2010-10-16T16:15:00.000-04:00

I've happily and successfully completed my second 5k! The past few weeks, I've had some great runs. I've been doing longer distances and kept a pretty good pace. My longer runs usually have me running 9 minute miles, but that's fine with me as long as I can get through the distance. I've been averaging 15 to 20 miles a week, which seems to be a nice healthy balance. I've kept up with taking days off, because I've realized as much as I love running and hate taking a day off, my body needs the rest and I run better when I balance it out.

I woke up this morning a little after 6 am, already thinking about the race. I wasn't planning to get up until well after 7, but I usually wake up early when I know I have something exciting going on. I spent about an hour on the couch, watching re-runs of the OC and reading. It was a very relaxing morning. A little after 7, I made some coffee and had a bagel.

I wasn't feeling as pumped for the 5k as I was last time, partly due to the weather and partly due to a late night last night. I ended up being DD for a friend, which I didn't mind, except this morning on my way to the 5k, I saw that someone had hit my car. At this time, no one has come forward and I'm still steaming about it.

Anyways, I had breakfast and continued to relax. I left the house a little after 8 and made my way to Grantham. Its about a 25 minute drive into the country. On my way, I noticed that the mountain had its first white covering. We got some snow yesterday and it definitely stuck on the higher grounds.

I got to the race location around 9 and immediately saw Chris. We ran the last 5k together. And when I say together, I usually follow him and then towards the end he takes off. I did a lot more warming up today, since it was pretty cold. About 40 degrees out, but with the wind chill, definitely in the 30s. We also ran part of the course, because neither of us knew the route.

A little before 10, everyone lined up. I learned from the last race to get a good front spot, which I did again this time. At 10am, we took off. The first half-mile is all up hill, which is a hard start. But I pushed hard to the top, and I pushed hard. About half way up the hill, I figured out I was in 7th position behind 6 guys, so I was the first girl (I kept this as the motivation for the race). At the top, you turn off onto a wide, steep downhill dirt path. It was a rough run on the legs with the terrain. I was definitely afraid of either slipping on the wet gravel or twisting an ankle. The rest of the run until the half way point was a dirt road.

At the water stop, everyone turned around and ran the same route, except this time, you had to run up the rough dirt path. It was the worst. I've run hills, but this was hard and it was a long hill. I had a few moments that I thought I wasn't going to make it, but I pushed. I could hear women behind me and I was afraid they were going to pass me. I made it to the top, still pushing. The rest was a half-mile down hill on pavement. A little down the hill, SHE passed me! She congratulated me on the pace I kept but she perused right by. I was irritated that I let a woman pass me, but either way I was feeling good about my run. I kept close to her for the remainder of the run.

At the bottom of the hill, I heard someone else behind me, and I wasn't going to let it happen. I knew it was another woman and I was determined to keep my position. And I did. I flew to the finish line. I finished 9th overall, 2nd for women, and 1st for women in my age group. My time was 25:14, which was a minute slower than my last 5k but given the brutal hills, I am definitely happy with my performance.

Overall, I'm really happy that I've taken up running and stuck with it. There are days where I definitely don't want to do it, but I do. Its not just physically beneficial, its definitely beneficial to my sanity as well. Running gives me time to think about everything, and it keeps me focused on something other than the actual run.

Next up might be the Monster Dash on Halloween. Its another 5k but everyone runs in costumes. Its a debatable run, since I don't want to push myself too much. I have registered for the Sunapee Turkey Trot on Thanksgiving Day and I'm trying to recruit more family and Appleseed team members to do it too!

Everybody's Working for the Weekend

2010-10-08T11:41:00.003-04:00

This week's been good. Been really busy at work, which is a nice change since it was so quiet this summer.

I started the process of applying for new jobs. I haven't led on to my boss that I am looking but with the summer work coming to an end, I have no choice. I've applied for two this week and will keep applying until I find something.

I've got a busy Columbus Day weekend planned with tons of work, and a few social plans here and there. I'm working two boats on Saturday and two boats on Sunday. Makes for long days, but the money's good and hey who couldn't use some extra cash. Secretly I'm planning on finally getting a new laptop and possibly an ipod touch after this weekend.

Running has been somewhat painful lately. I don't know if sometimes I've just pushed it too hard or what, but about once a month I have some ailment that causes pain when running. Right now its my left calf. Last month, I had the same problem with shin splints. I figure I'll take it easy for a few days maybe just do small runs every other day and pick back up next week.

I'm scheduled to run my second 5k next Saturday. Its another small fun run. My friend Chris is running this one again too, so I'm happy I'll have a running buddy, even if I'm just chasing his dust the whole run. I also signed up for the Sunapee Turkey Trot on Thanksgiving morning. I'm hoping that more of Team Appleseed will sign up too.

Its about a month until my swearing in and my parents' trip to NH. I'm more excited to see them than I am for the swearing in. The last time I saw my mom we were both 30 plus pounds heavier, so I think it'll be great to see each other so thin.

My wise words of advice for the week: if you're not happy, you're the only one that change that. Go out and do something about it!

73 Miles!

2010-10-01T11:39:00.002-04:00

Seriously, I've been tracking my running, including mileage, times, and my average running time for a mile. Over the course of September, I ran 73.13 miles! I wasn't expecting it to be that much, but I'm excited just the same.

I'd like to hit 80 for October but if I don't, I wouldn't be let down. I feel a whole lot healthier these days, and some days I can't believe what I looked like and felt like a year ago.

Besides running and spending time with friends, life has been pretty quiet lately. I've been meeting up with friends a lot more, which is nice, but I realized the toll of my social life when it took me over 3 hours to clean my apartment yesterday. This weekend its all about working, and getting my resume in order to begin the arduous process of job hunting.

Good News all Around!

2010-09-27T11:55:00.004-04:00

Good news all around today! I got my NH bar results, and I passed! Relief has definitely come over me; I'm done with bar exams forever!!! Of course, jokingly, people have asked which state I'll be barred in next, but I'm serious when I say I'm done with these exams. The anxiety of studying, taking the test and waiting for the results is just brutal. I wouldn't put myself through that again, I promise!

I've started to look for something full-time, since my current position is only part-time. I'm still really interested in following something in family law. There is a child support enforcement position that I am really interested in. I need to start working on my resume again, and get myself out there.

I've had a good week of running, as well. I've done a bunch of short runs, but I'm ready to dig in for something longer this weekend, maybe 5 miles. Wednesday, I ran one of the usual routes, but cut it a little short. 2.4 miles, with an average mile of 8:15. Thursday, I ran a mile to softball (a 7:39 mile), played softball for about an hour and a half, then ran the mile home, on a different route (with an 8:05 mile). Friday, I tried anew route. Not new to me at all, actually, I ran down the road I lived on for 12 years, though I hadn't run that route yet. It was a nice change, and definitely a more grueling route. 3.67 miles in 32:25 minutes, an average mile of 8:49. Despite my tiny hangover on Saturday, I ran my usual Southgate route of 2.6 miles. And on Sunday, I set out for a longer run 4.33 miles, with an average mile of 9:29 minutes. I've definitely noticed that I do slow down on my longer runs, but I am still able to run them and finish them. Slowing down doesn't bother me, I'm just anxious to be faster.

I'm determined to run another 5k in two weeks, and then the 5k Turkey Trot on Thanksgiving. Right now, I am debating a 5-miler on Columbus Day weekend at the Warner Fall Foliage Festival. I don't know the route at all and I've been told there is a pretty serious hill involved. If I can run a few longer runs before then, I might just do it. I wouldn't register until the day of, just in case my body isn't ready to do it then.

The only serious issue I've had with running is taking days off. It literally kills me not to run. I enjoy that time so much that I crave it. I'm going to start looking for either a yoga class or a cardio class in the area, because I need something else on those days.

I did it!

2010-09-22T10:30:00.002-04:00

After a week of bad runs, horrible shin splints and feeling like my body was hating me, I ran my first 5k (3.1 miles) on Sunday and out performed myself. Throughout the week, I had horrible runs; my body just wasn't handling the runs very well and I was feeling very discouraged. So on Thursday, I decided I really needed to invest in good running shoes if I was going to stick with this. I went to this great store, Runner's Alley in Manchester, and they were amazing. I spent about an hour there trying to decide between two pairs, both of which were great, but just trying to figure out which pair was the best for me.

Thursday afternoon, I took them for a quick test run. Despite the pain in my body, I knew it wasn't a result from the shoes, and I was happy with my purchase. I knew though that if I wanted to do well on Sunday, it meant no running until then. I was nervous because it seems like anytime I take a break, I regress, and I didn't want that to happen on Sunday. So I didn't run Friday or Saturday.

I went to bed early on Saturday night, and woke up feeling refreshed and anxious to run. I arrived at the State Park around 9:30 and immediately ran into a few people I knew. I felt better, because I had gone alone and it was nice to see some familiar faces.

I didn't know where to set myself up. There were more than 200 people and I was afraid of getting bogged down by the crowd. Fortunately the people I knew suggested we head up to the front. When we were there, Jess had mentioned she had seen me running but hadn't seen me at the last local 5k. I mentioned that while I had been running for a little while, this was my first race. She asked what my goal would be for myself. I said I'd be happy if I could get to an 8:00 mile. The fastest I have been so far is a 8:30 mile. I knew 8:00 minutes might be pushing it but maybe I needed the challenge.

There were a lot of kids on the starting line, which I wasn't looking forward to. When the gun shot went off, it was pretty intense. I took off, running pretty hard. I was trying to stay on Jess's heels, because I knew if I could do that, I'd do pretty well. A lot of the kids dropped out quickly which became an obstacle course for everyone trying to get around them.

At mile 1, I glanced down at my watch. I knew I had been running hard, but I didn't expect my first mile to be completed in 7:12 minutes. I also knew I had to slow down because I was breathing harder than I expected and I wanted to finish this race. I kept Jess in my sights for most of the run; it became my goal to keep up with her.

At mile 2, I had slowed down considerably. My second mile was about 8:45 minutes. Which I needed to recover from the first mile, and to keep myself going for the final mile plus. Finally, I heard the crowds, the finish line was much closer than I had expected. So I started pushing myself again. My body was tired and I was breathing hard, but I knew I only had a little more to go.

Finally, after weaving through the wooded roads of the Park, the finish line was in sight and I was running. I just wanted to be there! I crossed the finish line at 24:15. My final mile plus was about 8:15. Doing the math, its about an average of a 7:49 mile. I've never run that fast, but clearly I was determined. Afterwards, I did a lot of walking around, chatting with people and trying to recover with food and beverages.

I stayed for a while, waiting on awards and all the raffles. I didn't win anything, but I won the accomplishment of knowing I could finish a 5k and perform well. My body was definitely sore the day after, but I recovered faster than I thought I would. By today, my shins feel great, and I'm ready to get some more miles in. I did take Monday off, and I ran yesterday. I was pretty sore, but I did my usual 2.6 mile loop in 22 minutes, an 8:27 mile, which is where I like to be.

The official results have now come out. I finished #31 out of 207 participants. I am thrilled with my performance and can't wait to run another 5k, which I've already put on my calendar for next month. Below is a link to the results page, if you're interested.

http://www.kearsarge.org/sutton/lib/sutton/Overall10.pdf

Day of Rest

2010-09-14T17:30:00.001-04:00

After a full week of running, 7 days and running 24.43 miles, I needed a rest. So on Monday, I forced myself not to run. I wanted to so bad, but I knew my body needed the rest. On Saturday, I ran 2.6 miles in 21:22 minutes (a 8:33 minute mile) and on Sunday, I ran 3.6 miles in 30:15 minutes (a 8:24 minute mile).

Today was the first bad run I've had. My shin splints really kicked up, and I was in pain during most of the run. I did 3.6 miles, a run I do often, but in 33:00 flat; the worst time I've ever had for this distance (a 9:10 minute mile). The time isn't the worst, but I wanted my day of rest to make my runs better not worst. Afterwards, I came home and iced my shins; they're feeling better now, so I'm hoping to have a good run tomorrow.

I'm also definitely feeling the stress of the pending bar results. Its only a few more days until the results come out, but it feels like a lifetime. I can't wait for September 24th to be here. Its also an exciting time for my friend Sara. The day after I get my results, her husband comes home for a two week break from Iraq. He'll deploy again until January, but at least she'll get to see him for a few weeks.

Its official

2010-09-11T08:34:00.003-04:00

I've registered for my first 5k, next weekend. I finally decided that since I can handle long runs I should be able to handle an actual race. Its called the Strut in Sutton fun run. Its around a beautiful lake and there's a party afterwards, lots of prizes, etc.

On Thursday, I did 3.6 miles in 30:00 (an 8:20 mile), and yesterday, I did 4.6 miles in 44:15 (a 9:37 mile) . I don't know where my time came from on Thursday, but I'm pretty proud that I can get myself to run a pretty fast mile. My pace definitely slowed yesterday as it was a longer run and since I've been running a lot this week, I was feeling a little bit of muscle fatigue. I think I'll do something short today, and then run a 5k tomorrow to see where my time is at.

I also decided that I'm going to need an iPod soon. Running without the music can be great, since it clears my mind. But running with music will definitely be good too.

Its a beautiful day out. I'm trying to be productive this weekend, but I think I'll definitely get out to enjoy this weather too!

Run, Forest, Run

2010-09-09T11:31:00.003-04:00

As I mentioned in my last blog, I've been getting a lot of satisfaction out of running. Its extremely mind clearing. In fact since my iPod died a few months ago, I don't even listen to music when I run. Its my time to think about whatever is going on; it actually helps me to focus at other times, when I've made my run time to think about everything else.

Most days, I run in the afternoon after work. My main route has been about 2.59 miles, on some back roads, that include both paved and unpaved surfaces. My time usually stays between 22:30 and 23:00 minutes. The fastest I've run that route so far is 22:23, which is actually under a 9 minute mile, but I clearly remember being too sore the next day that I skipped my run. I was even dedicated enough during August that I even ran some days in 90 degree heat. Not the most sane idea, but I wanted to stick to it and see if I could make it a regular exercise routine for myself.

For a while, I was having a really hard time with shin splints, in only one my legs. Someone told me to run in the dirt for that issue. So after I few weeks of sticking to the dirt, I set out yesterday to do a long run. I ran 4.33 miles in 40:32. It averages out to about a 9:21 mile. I ran the entire time with no stops. I even ran uphill for about a quarter mile, without stopping during or at the top (like I promised myself I could, if I made it through the hill). I'm extremely happy with the time, given the distance, and it was first longer run. My shin bothered me a bit, but I pushed through.

I am also signing up for my first 5k. Its on Sunday, September 19th. I figure I'll do it, not make a big deal of it and see how I handle the pressure of a race and running with other people. Right now, I usually run alone. However where I run, everyone sees me and I get a lot of honking and waving. Its not the same as running with other people though. I think if I keep up the running for the next week and a half, I could get closer to a flat 9 minute mile than where I am now. I don't want to pressure myself, but I'd be happy if I had a good result on race day. I'll plan to run the route this weekend, just to see what its like.

I abandoned my blog

2010-09-08T10:29:00.003-04:00

Inadvertently, I abandoned my blog about 6 months ago and I have decided to reclaim it!

A year ago, I made the 1,000+ drive back from Kentucky to long-time home of Bradford, NH. If there's one thing I can say about that is that it was one of the best decisions of my life. I have never been so sure that Bradford is where I belong. Although none of my family is here, most of my friends are in Boston or further away, Bradford has been very good to me over the past year. While I've been here, I've lost 40 pounds, I got my first legal job, quit my first legal job, and started another position, and generally begun to realize how much fun you can have in life. I've reconnected with old friends, made tons of new friends, and been able to embrace being happy.

So rewind to my last blog. I had just started working my first firm job and loving it. It went good for a while and then it went down the tubes. Unfortunately, there was a lot of political bullshit going on about what we were doing and how we were doing it. Instead of risking my license and all that I worked for, I very reluctantly resigned. I have to say it was one of the hardest decisions of my life. I felt like I was giving up without giving it enough of a chance. I cried and agonized over the decision. My mom wasn't very supportive and didn't understand everything that was going on, at first. But a few weeks after I left, she started seeing stuff in the NH papers, and soon realized, that I did the best thing I could have. My brother, on the other hand, was hands down there for me and supported my decision 100%.

After I left, the firm really went down hill. They eventually closed their doors, without warning to their employees, and left many people without jobs and the pay they owed them. It was then that I realized even though it was a hard decision, my decision was the right one.

About 3 weeks after I quit, during which time I was unemployed, I accepted a part-time position with a local county. I am now Assistant Legal Counsel for Hillsborough County. It stinks that its part-time, since I drive an hour and a half every day, 5 days a week for work, but the networking is good, and my boss is very willing to help me find a position when I move on. Fortunately, during the summer months, I also had the work on the boats to keep me busy and my wallet full.

As if I didn't have enough going on, I also made the decision in May to sit for the NH bar in July. So I did. It wasn't easy getting back into studying but I worked myself into a routine. I'd work every day til 12:30, get home around 1:30 and hit the books by 2pm. I'd take a dinner/running break, then hit the books again til 9/10pm. It was pretty exhausting, but I made it work.

The test was in late July, and I'll know in about 2 weeks how everything will turn out. I don't have a feeling one way or another, its just so hard to tell. I'm thinking positive and hoping for the best. If all goes well, I'd like to find something permanent and full-time, that's right up my alley.

In April, I also moved into a new apartment, instead of staying with my family. Its actually two floors above the bar, which can be very convenient at times! I also purchased my first new car. Brand new, 2010 Toyota Corolla. It was a big decision, but the Hyundai only had so much more to give and it wasn't fairing well through the winter.

During the bar, I started running. At first, I couldn't run very far. I'd stop and start again, but always trying to keep going as far as possible. Today, I can run 2.6 miles without stopping in under 23 minutes. This week, I bumped myself up to 3 miles and I've still kept a pretty good pace. 9:24 as of yesterday. I have run a few times under 9 minutes, but I'd rather be able to run consistently good days with average times, than have to skip a day because I've pushed it too hard. I enjoy it though; it gives me time to think and if I'm thinking about other things, I generally run better than if I'm focusing on my run

All in all, I'm pretty happy with where I am in life. Looking back on that horrible day in April when I received the news that I had failed the Massachusetts Bar exam, I wouldn't have pictured myself where I am today. But I have to say, even though it was hard facing that news, packing up my life, and moving to Kentucky, I'm more happy today, than I have been in a long, long time. A year can make a big difference, and it has for me.

Wild women do, and they don't regret it!

2010-02-02T18:32:00.005-05:00

I'm three weeks into my new position, and so far I'm really happy. At my firm, we mostly focus on loan modifications and debt settlement. Most of my clients are my behind on their mortgage and can't afford to pay their mortgage and all their other household expenses. Through a federal program enacted by President Obama, Making Homes Affordable, if you can get a lender to agree to drop the mortgagee's payment to about 38% of their monthly gross income, this program will subsidize the lender the other 7% so that the mortgagee is only paying about31% out of their monthly gross income. While 31% may seem like a high amount, its pennies to what these people have already been paying.

One of my clients was just offered a trial plan, which is a 3 month payment plan, before their are accepted into a permanent plan, that will save her over $600 a month on her mortgage. That's an insane amount.

On top of that, a lot of our clients have serious amounts of credit card debt, and if they're not paying their mortgage, they definitely aren't paying their credits. So I also get to negotiate payments on their debts for pennies on the dollar.

Its really satisfying to help these clients, because they really do need the help. But its also incredibly frustrating to deal with a lot of these lenders. Its always a waiting game. You send something in, they don't upload into their system for 3 days. 2 weeks later, they tell you the form isn't right and they need a new one. And the process starts all over again. A lot of my clients have also already tried to negotiate with their lender or handle their own loan modification, only to be ignored and pushed away. Its incredibly frustrating that you sign a note for this large sum of money, and they'd rather not help you at all.

Its also frustrating because you wonder why on earth a lender would ever agree to giving a person a mortgage of this caliber. Sometimes it seems like they've been waiting for the mortgagee to fail all along. The flipside is though given our economy a lot of clients had no problem paying their bills and had plenty of money left over. But when the economy took a dive, a lot of people lost their jobs, had reduced hours, etc. Its not just that people agreed to a mortgage they could never afford.

I'm sure to anyone reading this, it screams out "NERD," however its actually gratifying when you can get a lender to work with you and you can help someone out their financial mess.

To make a long story short, work is going well. Its a lot of hours and it can be pretty intense, but I seem to handle it well and my clients seem to be happy with my performance. I also manage to make it to the gym about 4 days a week after work and I try to make it there one day on the weekend; however it is a 30 minute drive from home, so sometimes that can be pushing it.

The Deep End

2010-01-29T14:28:00.000-05:00

Rarely do I blog about anything other than my life, but I thought I should dedicate some space to the new ABC show "The Deep End." I'm in love. The show depicts the life of first year associates, fresh out of law school, and new attorneys in the legal world. Its hilarious and so realistic, at the same time. So that's my plug!

In other news, I start my new job on Monday. I'm a bit nervous, because of all bad rumors about the office and the sole partner. Of course, once I have finally landed something, the requests for interviews start pouring in. I had another great interview yesterday at a firm in Quincy, that focuses on railroad law. Interestingly enough, my friend Susan recently left the firm. She enjoyed working there, but left for personal reasons.

Unfortunately, I stressed myself out about the interview, because I already have a job. I'm just nervous about what will happen, if this actually comes through. And then of course, I don't know if this is actually what I want. I'm not sure what I want, besides a legal job, where I can put my degree to work. Moreover, I'm freaked about moving etc. Its all stressing about things that haven't even happened yet, but it just let it all get to me!

Finally, some of the most exciting news is that I hit the 20 pound mark today. Actually its 20.5 pounds, but I'm happy all the same!

Day 20 of 20!

2010-01-24T12:37:00.002-05:00

The title says it all. I've stuck to my workout plan and dieting for another week. Tomorrow starts the third week of South Beach, where I can move into Phase 2. There are more foods to eat and enjoy, however, I might try to stick out Phase 1 another week or two. I've seen really good results with the combination of South Beach and working out, so I plan to continue. I've lost an additional 3 pounds since my last post, so my total weight lost is currently 19 pounds.

Next week, I start working a REAL law job. Its almost unbelievable that I'll finally be working, using my degree. I'm excited and nervous about it at the same time. Either way, it'll be good to start working full-time. I'll also continue working the weekend at the restaurant; the extra money is well worth the time!

In other happy news, my mom got denied for lap band surgery. I know it sounds harsh that I'm happy about this, but I truly did not think this surgery would be the best solution for her. I think she's been really unhappy with her weight, so her solution was this surgery so it would be a quick and easy fix to the problem. Unfortunately, most people that make the decision to have lap band surgery as a quick fix, will gain the weight back, because they don't stick to the diet plan that's required after the surgery.

Even though, she's not going to have the surgery, she has been working out everyday and dieting with weight watchers. She seems to be happy with herself and her success so far. If she's determined enough, she'll reach her goals by working out and dieting.

Day 14 of 14!

2010-01-18T21:05:00.000-05:00

One of my main goals of 2010 is to be truly comfortable with my body. So for the past 14 days, I've been working out almost every day, I've only missed 3 days so far. For the first week, I tried to diet by just eating less. That didn't produce a lot of results, so last week, I started the South Beach diet.

Its not as hard as people made it out to be. While there is a lot of food you can't eat, there's a ton of food you can eat. As of last Thursday, which was only day 4 of South Beach, I'd lost 2.5 pounds. Since I haven't weighed myself in since then, I don't know where I am at now. But I feel good, so I think that's all that really matters.

I enjoy being able to eat a lot of cheese and meat. The only things I really miss is potatoes. Any kind: white or sweet. After phase 1 of south beach, you can start eating sweet potatoes again, which I think will make me very happy! I did have a few instances where I found out after I ate something that it wasn't on the approved food list, but I don't think its going to kill me. I have deliberately cheated yet. If I've gotten through a week of it without cheating, I think I'll be ok.

Happily since May, which is a big measuring point for me, I've lost 16 pounds. I'm hoping to lose about another 15 pounds before the summer.

In addition to dieting, my workout routine includes the Biggest Loser Cardio Max DVD. I always thought workout videos would be a joke, but I have to say I sweat a lot while using this video. And as corny as it is, I like doing it. I'm looking to purchase another one soon, because I know the first 2 routines by heart now.

In other news, my mom is also working hard to lose weight. She got a Wii for Christmas and has been doing the Wii Fit a lot. But she's also currently applying to get the lap band surgery. I'm not crazy about this idea at all. I haven't told her how I feel yet, but I've had a lot of questions. I'm not crazy about unnecessary surgeries. I know she isn't healthy at her current weight, but I also don't think she's worked to find a good plan for her yet. She hasn't been approved yet for the surgery, so hopefully in the meantime she's going to continue working hard to lose weight on her own. I love my mom and want her to be happy, I'm just nervous about the surgery.

A good friend of mine lost her Dad during gastric bypass two years ago. I know gastric bypass is different than the lap band, but its risky surgery none the less. I'd never want to have to live through the nightmare she has.

Here's to the New Year!

2009-12-30T17:48:00.002-05:00

I don't think I could be more glad that 2009 is over with. I have to say it wasn't the easiest year for me, but I'm glad that I went through the struggles I did, to really appreciate where I am now.

I've focused a lot of my blog on failing the bar, the first time around. While I don't think it says anything about me, the whole process (the denial, acceptance, perseverance, and finally succeeding) means something to me. I pushed through something that others would have given up on, and I did so with flying colors. I don't think my adventure is all that exciting or interesting for some people, I do think at some point in my life, I'd like to help other students that have been in the same position I was. I think it could be very beneficial. I know I could have used someone to talk to, when I failed, that had been through the same thing.

I truly believe 2010 will be an awesome year. I'm a licensed attorney, with a job. I can only foresee things getting better from here on out. While I've always said it may take me longer to get there, I'll get there. I will succeed and I'll do it with pride!

I'll leave this blog with some words of wisdom: be happy in what you do. Be good or be good at it. Don't just go through life making the motions, enjoy your life and laugh.

FINALLY!!

2009-11-28T18:15:00.001-05:00

Ok, so I feel like I unintentionally abandoned my blog, so I'm here to reclaim it! Here goes: finally, after all the hard work, sweat and tears, I passed the bar! I don't think I could have been more elated and emotional about it. I actually happened a few weeks ago, but I just haven't had the time to sit down and write about it.

It was Wednesday, October 28th and I was driving back from an afternoon in Manchester. I got a text from Sue, stating that she saw on a website that Mass bar results were out. I immediately panicked and had to pull the car over. I had been waiting weeks for this day, but I was suddenly so unprepared for it. I had already been to the mailbox once that day, and with living in a small town, the mail only comes once a day. Either way, it was close to five o'clock so I knew I had to at least try to get there before 5pm to check the mail again.

I ran in and went straight to our P.O. Box. I open it and staring at me is a letter. I freaked. I picked up and of course, it was junk mail. It was such a tease! I get back home and I'm a mess. I'm all freaked out about the results. I was pacing, couldn't sit still and generally a nervous wreck. We discussed a plan for the morning.

Generally the mail isn't out until 10am. Therefore, the plan was for Pete and I (I couldn't do it alone) to head to the mail box at 10 am. I could hardly sleep that night. I woke up at 9 am on Thursday and tried to force myself to stay in bed longer. I didn't want to rush to the mailbox and not have it be there. Finally, I couldn't contain myself any longer. I got up and rushed around throwing clothes on. Tim yelled to me because he couldn't understand what I was doing. I finally just said, I have to go, now! I can't wait. Even if its not there, I can't wait any longer.

Tim asked if he could join me, and I told him yes as long as he was dressed to leave immediately. We jumped into his car and sped off to the post office, maybe a 2 mile drive away. So we get there. I throw my seat belt off and am rushing to get out of the car. Tim decided to come with me. We go to the box, and for a brief moment, I tried to stop and remember this day, because I knew it would be good. Finally, I opened the box, and there it was. The letter I had been waiting for. I screamed, "Its here, its right on top." I couldn't contain the excitement.

We grabbed the letter, but I couldn't leave without first getting Pete and Beth's mail too. I thought that would only be appropriate. We get to the car, and we're both unsure of what to do next. So I gave Tim the letter, he held it, and then he had the dog kiss it for good luck. He handed it back to me, but I couldn't open it right away. I was just trying to soak it all in, and say my last minute prayers. But before I opened it, I flipped it over, and right through the paper, I could clearly see "Congratulations!" I went a little crazy. I must have yelled something like "I passed," but Tim couldn't understand what was going on. I ripped open the letter and started reading it. I dawned on him what i was trying to tell him. We were yelling, hugging and I was crying. It was so emotional.

We left the post office and I immediately called my mom. She answered the phone and while I am still crying, I just blurted out "I passed!" Of course, she starts crying on the phone too.

It was such an emotional day. I cried, I celebrated and I felt at ease, for the first time in a long time. I am being sworn in on Tuesday, and I can't wait for this part of the journey to be over. Its still hard to believe that on Tuesday I will be a licensed attorney!

In other news, I also have a job interview lined up next week. After all the cover letters, writing samples and resumes I've sent out, I've finally started to see results. Even if this job doesn't come to fruition, its a start. No matter what happens, things are looking up and I have a lot of people to thank for that!

Epiphany

2009-09-27T10:19:00.002-04:00

A few days ago, I finally had this amazing epiphany about my life and what I've been going through. When I first failed the bar, I was devastated and in complete denial. I went through this period where I thought the bar was going to send me this letter and let me know there was a mix-up, that I really had passed the bar. I was so deep in denial that I had failed.

When I really started studying in Kentucky, I was able to move past the denial and get down to work. Clearly being a lawyer is something I have always wanted to be, and I'm not going to give it up.

I was in the kitchen a few days ago with the Petes, and Big Pete turned to me and said, "I think you're here for a reason right now." I didn't have to stop and think because I completely agreed with him. I think everything that I've gone through in the past year was for a reason. I think I failed the bar because I needed to realize my life wasn't going in a good direction. I also think I failed the bar because it forced me to leave a relationship, that already wasn't working.

I think it all happened for a reason. It gave me a wonderful summer with my parents and Freddie, which I probably would have never had but for failing the bar. It gave me re-direction on my life and determination to reach my goals. It also reminded me that NH is home. Coming here after a summer in Kentucky, I now know I want to be in NH; this is my home and always will be. Finally, I am ok and I am at peace with the fact that I failed the bar.

I feel like as horrible as it was when I failed the bar and how devastated I was, its ok now. I am going to be a lawyer, I am going to get a job and I am going to achieve my goals.

Tribute to Freddie

2009-09-21T21:35:00.009-04:00

Freddie, our dear golden retriever, unfortunately passed away today. He's been sick for quite some time and the vet finally told my parents today that it was cancer, they just couldn't locate it in his body. Because he's been losing so much weight and inability to control his body, the vet said it was really time for him. My parents were with him when he was put to sleep and they're both crushed from his loss.

Freddie was a very loyal dog, and enjoyed most of his days with my dad, at work. He went every day until this summer. Since I was home all day, my dad would leave him with me while I studied because all he did was sleep anyway. He did enjoy our study breaks for a snack and quick walk to the mailbox. He even enjoyed laying out by the pool. As long as someone was close by, Freddie was happy.

Freddie came to us from a rescue shelter in Alabama. When he was found, they believed he was likely about 8 years old and had been on the street for sometime. Although we only had Freddie for 6 years, he was a great addition to our family and will surely be missed.

Below are some of my favorite pictures of Freddie from this summer.

Freddie looks kinda unhappy in this last picture. I think that's because it was the day I left Kentucky and the last time I got to see him.

Working hard for the money....

2009-08-30T22:23:00.005-04:00

I've been in NH about 4 weeks now, and I've been working pretty hard ever since. I've enjoyed working since I haven't done it in months. However, I have to admit its been hard. Its not easy to go from studying all day 7 days a week to working 9-10 hour days.

During late August and Early September, I worked usually 9 am to about 9/10pm. I would get up, walk Bailey (the family dog and my new BFF), shower, then head to the boats. Since the boats were still running during the week, they needed to be cleaned daily also. I would spend a few hours cleaning both boats, then I would start my shift for the daily tour on the MV Sunapee. Mostly I sold tickets, chatted with passengers, and tied/untied the boat at docking and launching.

After my shift there, I would either head back to the restaurant to work the dinner shift, or move to the MV Kearsarge to get ready for the dinner cruise boat. I really enjoy working the boats, because you get to know people. Most people are generally polite and interested to talk to you. However, there's always that mischievous/rude few that get the galley up in a roar.

A few weeks ago, we got hit by Hurricane Danny. For the most part it was really only rain, except for the wind and rain on the lake. When you work on boats, weather can be issue, even though we do sail rain or shine. Unfortunately yesterday though, the rain was so strong that it took 2 of us to pull in one of the boats in order to dock it properly. In the process of doing that, one of the poles we were supposed to tie up to, broke off the dock and sank, proving to make the process 100 times harder. The pole was fixed but it was quite the adventure that day.

Other than that, I've started focusing more on job searching. For a while I really wasn't sure where I wanted to be and what I was going to do. Now, I've narrowed it down a little and I'm really considering permanently settling in NH. I've even applied for a few positions here. The only downfall to all this: I would have to take the NH bar in February. Some people think I am gluten for punishment. Three bars in a row?? But really, I've always loved NH and while I enjoyed my time in Boston, I don't want to settle down there. However, I would consider the north shore and/or south shore, if I found the right job for me.

For a while now, I've even allowed myself to forget about the bar and the pending results. But I'm really starting to get anxious now. I know many people are pulling for me, as I am pulling for my self, but I'm just ready to know already.

I'm also back to babysitting. This weekend, I am with Walker (3.5) and Barrett (1.5), while their parents are away at a wedding in Maine. Over the 4th of July, I also spent the weekend with Walker and Bear while their parents were at a wedding in Denver. They're great little boys and a lot of fun. However, at the end of the weekend, I'm pretty exhausted from chasing after them.

On a sadder note, our dear golden Freddie is not doing so well these days. The vet is pretty sure he has some sort of internal infection, yet they haven't figured out just what yet. I know he's old, but that doesn't make it easy.

Below is a favorite picture of Freddie and our time together, this summer in Kentucky.

No one said this was going to be easy....

2009-08-24T22:33:00.004-04:00

I've officially arrived and begun settling in, in Bradford. The road trip left a little to be desired though. On Saturday, I realized my phone was broken and wouldn't charge, so I couldn't call everyone I know anymore to keep my entertained, rather than talking to myself I also got extremely lost in the DC area and ended up at Fort Myers. I tried explaining to the guard that I just needed to make a u-turn, but alas I had to go to the "search the vehicle" tent. I did manage to avoid getting searched since I kept insisting I was only needing to turn around. Because the directions were unclear off the exit, I spent an extra 75 minutes or so in the car, trying to find Sue and Lokesh's house. Boy was I happy and relieved to have a reprieve from the car for a few hours.

Saturday night, we stayed in and Hamad (a good friend from Law School) came over to join us for a Wii bowling tournament. Although I'd never played any Wii activity before, I won 2 out of the 3 bowling sets.

On Sunday morning, Sue, Lokesh and I enjoyed a wonderful breakfast buffet at the nearby Marriott. I hit the road around noon and of course, immediately got lost trying to get out of the city. It took me a good hour plus to get in the right direction and an ok route to travel. I spent the rest of the day traveling the roads less traveled and mostly in the dark, in and around Upstate New York and Vermont.

Traveling through Vermont was by far the worst, though. The directions I got sent me through the back roads of Vermont. While I'm sure it would have been a very nice scenic trip through Vermont during the daytime, at night time in the rain, not so much. It just seemed like I was never going to get on a road that was remotely familiar or even not so scary.

Eventually at 10:30ish on Sunday night, I finally arrived in the beautiful Bradford, NH. While most people probably would not understand my love and appreciation of Bradford, if you live in the city long enough, you would appreciate Bradford for all it has to offer. Of course I'm extremely happy to be somewhere I refer to as "home," I haven't felt as settled and comfortable as I would like. I know that will come with time, as most things do in my life, but seriously, I'm so anxious to get this chapter of my life over with.

"No one said this was going to be easy, but no one said it would be this hard. "The past year has been so amiss of anything satisfying. Sometimes, I really feel like things should be a little easier than they are. However, I know that when it does finally come to me, I will be extremely appreciative and satisfied that all my hard work has finally paid off. Someday, I will practice law and I will understand struggles that many others have not had the pains of dealing with. My hope is that one day I can share that with other law students, who also understand these struggles, and help them to overcome these issues.

So now that I'm in NH, what is a girl to do with herself? Well, work at the restaurant/boats starts tomorrow, for me, and I'll be working a lot. I need it though; not working can be a complete drain, since I crave being busy and feeling like I am actually doing something with my time rather than sitting around doing nothing.

"History has demonstrated that the most notable winners usually encountered heartbreaking obstacles before they triumphed. They won because they refused to become discouraged by their defeats."-- Bertie C. Forbes

My time is coming to an end....

2009-08-16T16:18:00.006-04:00

I can't believe I've been living in Kentucky for just about 3 months. I have to say when I first made the decision to come to Kentucky, it was a decision that I was really forced to make and it wasn't an easy to decision to make. While I was apprehensive at first, Kentucky has really treated me well this summer. Its given me a chance at a new beginning on making a life for myself, one that I know will be exactly what I want and how I want it!

Surprisingly, Kentucky has been really peaceful and relaxing. There's not much to stress about here, and being around the animals has been pretty awesome too. I've also managed to lose a little more than 10 pounds.

For the first time in a long time, I can say I'm truly happy. It almost brings me to tears to say that. It sounds like such a cliche, but with everything that happened, I was forced to move on with a life that was not working for me and find a way to make things work. Its taken a long time to realize it but the relationship wasn't working and I needed out. Its easier to see these things from the outside looking in, than the inside looking out.

Sadly and also happily, I'll be leaving to head to NH on Saturday. I feel like its time to move on with my life; I'm ready to make another big move and finally establish myself in the world. I know I'll miss my family, but being up north feels like home to me, it always has. Even now, when I don't really have a "home", but am just staying with friends until I get settled, the Appleseed (which is where I'll be staying) feels more like home than anything else right now.

To my loyal blog followers, even though I wouldn't be getting lucky in Kentucky anymore, I'll still continue to write. I don't think this journey that I'm on is quite over yet and there will be plenty more moments to share with you all.

P.S.: when and if any of you ever get the chance to visit Kentucky, I strongly recommend it; I even know of a small little farm in a place called Elizabethtown that always welcomes guests.

Alabama Slamah!

2009-08-09T21:41:00.009-04:00

I just got back to Kentucky from an insane weekend in Alabama. My good friend, Jenn, from Quinnipiac, works at Auburn University in Alabama. I figured since it was only 7 hours from my parents' house and since I'd probably never get back to Alabama, this would be a once in lifetime trip, and that it was.

I left Kentucky Friday morning and spent the day making the 470 mile drive to Jenn's place. I stopped a few times on the way down, since I had extra time to make the trip. When Jenn got home from work, we were able to catch up for a bit, before heading out. We went to dinner and had some amazing food, including corn nuggets. They were fried deliciousness - bits of creamed corn fried and then dipped in honey mustard. Heavenly!

After that, we headed to a bar in downtown Auburn, Bodega. We sat for a while catching up and generally having a good time. Jenn's friend, Keven, met up with us for some good times. Keven just took the bar last week too, so he was looking to do a bit of celebrating as well, and we did just that.

Around midnight we headed to a bar called The Supper Club. The Supper Club is known for good cover bands and they stay open until 5am. In the back of the bar, there's a broken down bus that you get on just for shots. We did a round of shots on the bus and then moved inside to listen to the cover band, Rumor Mill. They did a lot of stuff from the 80s and 90s and were pretty good. Fun to dance to and fun to listen to.

I met some random guys, from some unknown location, whose names I definitely don't remember, that just started buying us drinks and so we let them. I think we stayed at the bar until maybe 4am, however, I'm not really sure since I was beyond drunk.

We got up around 10:30 the next morning, and I knew before I could even move it was going to be a rough day. A few minutes after we woke up, I realized my purse was MIA. We couldn't find it anywhere in Jenn's apartment. We even drove back to the Supper Club, but of course it wasn't there either. I barely made it through lunch with Jenn and her friends, before I had to get back to Jenn's apartment to hunt down my purse. Fortunately, I found it under her bed; I'm sure I placed it there for safe keeping, during my drunkenness.

I spent the rest of the day dying on Jenn's couch, to be cured from my horrendous hangover at about 7pm. We spent the rest of the evening watching old episodes of "How I Met Your Mother." I liked the show and I even think I am going to go out and get Season 1 on dvd this week.

This morning, Jenn and I grabbed some grease-tastic breakfast at IHOP and reminisced about the insanity of this weekend. We did a quick tour of Auburn University, too. Jenn managed to give me lots of Auburn swag to come home with too.

Sadly, I had to leave the wonderful place of Auburn to come home today. The drive was much faster this time and I got home around 8:30 pm.

It's Over!

2009-08-01T15:51:00.003-04:00

I've been home a little more than 24 hours and all I want to do is sleep. The good news, though, is that the bar is over, for better or for worse. It was a pretty good trip, except for the lack of sleep.

Monday, I left my parents at 5:45am to get to the airport for my day of flying. Interestingly enough, I spent a lot of time in LaGuardia, where I was just a few weeks ago. The only bad part of flying from NY to Providence was the tin can they flew us on. I got to stare at the perpeller out my window for 60 minutes of hell. I've never been motion sick before and I felt horrible after that flight. After that I just kinda relaxed the remainder of the day. I had a great homemade dinner with Sam and Dave, and some much needed wine.

Tuesday, I had a great meeting with Janda, just recapping the essays and some suggestions for Thursday. I also had an amazing lunch with Ilene. I am so glad to have her in my life, because she's been an amazing mentor and supporter through this entire process. After that, I treated myself to a viewing of "The Hangover." The movie was hilarious! I couldn't stop laughing. I spent the rest of the night trying to relax and not think about the next day.

Wednesday and Thursday felt like disasters. I was a little more anxious that I would have liked, but maybe that's a good thing, especially since last time around I think I was a little too cocky about the whole thing. The best thing that could have happened though, was the examinee next to me. When I approached my sit, I knew the girl looked familiar; it just so happens that we were acquaintances in law school, sat next to each other at graduation and had bar prep classes together; being near someone familiar was so relaxing.

Anyways, I survived, no matter the outcome. Thursday night, I drove to Rhode Island and stayed with Sue's mom. She was so nice to have me, and even provided me with my favorite beer and pizza for dinner. I passed right out that night, and had no problem sleeping, especially compared to the rest of the week. The only downfall was that we had to be up at 4am to get to the airport.

I didn't sleep through either of my flights, as I would have liked. I got back to my parents yesterday around 3 pm and happily slept until 10am this morning. I've spent the day being super lazy, although I did get to ride for the first time this morning. My parents and I are going out to dinner tonight to celebrate my birthday and being done with the bar. I'm glad that I actually get to start enjoying the summer now.

The Dogs

2009-07-17T22:28:00.013-04:00

Between my family and our friends, there is a little cast of character in dogs here in Kentucky.

Well all know the first and most important dog in my life, Fred. Since I've been in Kentucky, Fred doesn't go to work with my Dad, as much; he enjoys spending the day with me, even though all I do is study. Fred's just happy being around people and having someone to pet him. Here's a few classic pictures of Fred...

Fred has a not-so secret admirer, Dory. She's a very demanding little Westie and kinda dirty most of the time too.

These are the neighbor's dogs, Sam aka Moo the Bull Mastiff and Monkey, the mutt. They're good dogs, although Sam, who weighs approximately 240 pounds is scared of anything and everything. That is unless you are on his property, then he goes wild.

Monkey is about 6 months old and he's pretty dam smart. He's a cute little dog and just wants constant companionship.
Sam will sit at any sink until you turn it on for him. He prefers his water out of a sink or toilet, rather than the standard dog bowl.

Look forward to a future post focusing solely on the numerous cats on the farm.

See ya soon!!

2009-07-08T20:37:00.018-04:00

I'm already back in Kentucky from my weekend in Boston. I arrived on Thursday evening, and was happily picked up by Sue and Lokesh. We proceeded to the Barking Crab, for some seafood and good laughs. I was so happy to see both Sue and Lokesh as I haven't seen them since they left Boston in April. We had a great time and I was very thankful for some fresh seafood. While Kentucky does have fast food seafood and Red Lobster, I much prefer the fresh stuff and wouldn't anything else. Say no to Captain D's!!

I spent the remainder of the weekend, with two incredible little boys: Walker, 3, and Barrett, 18 months. We had a lot of great play time and enjoy the 4th of July festivities in Needham. The only downfall to the weekend is Barrett's inability to be consoled in the middle of the night. His two year molars were coming in and he had no desire to be in his bed at 1 am. Hence, the party in my bed, and the little amount of sleep I got. Although it was a lot of work, it was a lot of fun and it was a great study break!

I returned home Monday night, and have been on the go since, just studying and ready to get this test behind me! I'll be back in Boston in 3 weeks for the big test and hopefully soon after that, to find a new place to live, a job and a fresh start on life.

Here's Walker enjoying some time on his balance bike. He's 3 and can already ride without training wheels. He's also really photogenic.

Here's Barrett tending to the grass in the driveway; he loves to use his mower and doesn't care that there aren't in bubbles in it.

Leaving home. I love Boston and the people there. While I can't wait to get back, I am enjoying the relaxation and non-stress Kentucky has to offer.

Almost home..

2009-06-29T19:41:00.002-04:00

Its true, I'm almost home. In a few days, I'll be headed back to Boston for a long 4th of July weekend. While I'm excited about being back, I wouldn't have had this opportunity, if I hadn't decided to nanny for the weekend. Although it will be a lot of work, I am so excited for it. I think it'll be a great, much needed break from studying.

I land in Boston around 6pm on Thursday. Sue has already agreed to pick me up from the airport, so we can spend some quality time catching up. I can't wait. Since Sue left for DC in April, I haven't seen her and there's truly been something missing in my life since. She's an incredible friend and confidant!

After a scrumptious meal, Sue will drop me off in Needham for three days of uninterrupted fun with Walker, 3 and Barrett, 18 months. I'll surely be tired when Sam and Dave arrive home on Sunday evening, but I think I'm going to enjoy it.

I have grand plans of making it to the Capozzi BBQ on Saturday afternoon. Unless some major crisis occurs, I have full intentions of dragging the kids out, so I can get in a few minutes with friends.

On Monday, I depart back to Kentucky for a few jam packed weeks of studying and stressing. If you're planning on heading to Mike's party on Saturday, I hope to see you there!

I fought the law and I won!

2009-06-25T19:50:00.003-04:00

During the trip to Kentucky, I was stopped by Kentucky's finest. The officer claimed I was going 78 in a 65 mph zone. I believe I was the victim of profiling because I had Massachusetts license plates. The officer was kind enough to give me a ticket, which would have cost me $170. Since I was given the option, I figured I'd drive to Traffic Court for the hearing and take my chance with the judge.

So on Monday, I drove the 85 miles to court for my hearing. As I entered the court, outcomes a small child wearing nothing but a shirt and a diaper running around in the courthouse. I knew right away this would be a different experience than the Boston courts. I got through security and went up to the courtroom. Everyone else appeared to be standing in line, so I followed their lead.

When I got to the front of the line, I gave the clerk my last name. She looked up the information and simply asked, "were you speeding?" In a comical fashion, I answered "no." She looked at me, as if recognizing that she's not as stupid as I thought she was. Her response to me, "Ok, I'll dismiss it with a warning." I was almost dumbfounded. Could it really be this easy?

It could be. I was in the courthouse for maybe a maximum of 8 minutes, before I left to drive the 85 miles back home. On my way home, I decided to treat myself, after my great victory. I drove straight to the liquor store.

In Elizabethtown, where my parents live, its a dry county, so you have to drive at least 25 to 30 minutes to the closest liquor store. So having seeing the opportunity of a liquor store, I knew I had to take advantage of the opportunity. At the particular liquor store I went, I'm sure they knew I wasn't from around there. Every other customer that came to the store while I was there used the drive through. Yes, a drive through liquor store!

Besides my recent victory over the speeding ticket, I really have not been up to much else. In exciting news, I will be in Boston for the 4th of July weekend, during which I may make a special appearance at the Capozzi BBQ.

Happy 70th Birthday Dad!

2009-06-14T21:10:00.000-04:00

My mom and I really pulled one over on my Dad. Friday, we told him that we would be going out on Saturday night for dinner for his birthday, and he was pretty excited about it. He'd been talking about going back to the Japanese Steakhouse for a while.

When he went in for his shower last night, to get readyto go to dinner, my mom and I set up everything - the food, decorations, etc. When my Dad emerged from the bathroom, he was speechless when he saw everyone in the house. The first thing out of his mouth was: "So weren't not going out to dinner?" Obviously not!

It was a great success and a really fun night for my dad. There's was tons of food, alcohol and laughs - what more can a guy ask for? Of course, plenty of thrilling gag gifts were all provided to him.

Below is a few pictures of my Dad's cake, and his most prized birthday gifts.

My Dad is still a die hard Red Sox fan, even after they moved to Kentucky. They order a special baseball package every summer so he can watch the games.

He's in his glory, with his best dog by his side!

His most favorite gifts. The Jingle Jugs we got at Spencer's. It sings "Beers and Tits" all the while the jugs are jingling. And of course, an old fart obviously needs an bedside urinal.

Nothing new

2009-06-12T23:00:00.000-04:00

Well I thought I'd post a little update on the happenings in Kentucky. There hasn't been a whole lot going on, not too much happens in Kentucky.

Last night, I survived my first Tornado warning. The tornadoes passed to the south of us and we only had a small thunderstorm. As much as we complain about New England weather, it storms every other day here and we're constantly losing power.

I've been putting in a lot of time studying, and really that's about all. Since I have never lived here (before now), I don't know anyone, so there's not really anyone to go out with. I have yet to go out and do anything social with anyone in Kentucky. While I know I made a really good decision about coming to study here, its hard at times because there is no one to hang out with. I know this is a good thing because I can get a lot of studying in, but I could use a much needed mental break at times.

The one thing I hope this summer gives me is a chance to let go. Its been hard to let go of my relationship with Matt, even though its already gone. I think the letting go has been more or less about being alone and not having someone to share things with.

I also really need to let go of my anger over the bar; nothing else can be done at this point. Ever since I found out I failed, I've been angry about it. I just have a tendency to get angry over the fact that I have to be studying again, when there are plenty of others who probably didn't put in half the effort I did, and they passed.

One thing that has given me joy this summer is being here for my Dad's 70th birthday. Tomorrow, we'll be having his surprise 70th Birthday party for him, and I'm so glad I'll actually be around for it. While he's not my biological Dad, there's no difference to me. He's always been an amazing Dad to me, much better than my biological father. I'm just very happy I can be here for such a big birthday.

I hope everyone in Boston is doing well and I hope you all know you're amazing friends and that I miss you dearly!

Kentucky Oddities...

2009-06-07T16:20:00.000-04:00

Below is a list of a few odd things about the people and places in Kentucky.

1. When I grew up, we have ice cream trucks that came around to the neighborhoods. Emphasis on "trucks." In Kentucky, they have ice cream vans. Like the vans often equipped with handicapped lifts. Now ice creams vans scream out "Alert pedophile!" Anybody else?

2. When it rains not only do you lose electricity and cable, you also lose radio stations.

3. While watching TV, I saw a commercial for Universal Technical Institute. However instead of referring to it by name, they kept calling it UTI. To me and probably a lot of other people, UTI means urinary tract infection. Poor choice for an acronym!

4. A lot of people refer to Kentucky and Indiana as Kentuckiana. Funny, I thought these were two different states.

I'll have more oddities to come, but this is just the start of what I think will be a very long list!

Animals on the Farm

2009-05-29T23:40:00.000-04:00

Since my parents moved to Kentucky, their household,which once contained one dog and one cat, has dramatically expanded to include a what could be moderate sized petting zoo! Below are pictures and a little bit about each animal or group of them.

First and foremost, is Fred. Fred is our golden retriever that we rescued from Alabama about 5 years ago. Fred is a big character. He spends most of his day sleeping, even when he goes to work everyday with my dad. He's treated very well and his favorite part of the day is eating off my dad's fork, at the dinner table, every night. Fred is also well known for his babysitting capabilities, pictured below.

Here's Fred babysitting the kittens, who we've been fostering since two weeks before their birth. They're intrigued by him - he could care less about them. To him its one more damn cat in this house that deprives him of our attention (this is how we think Freddy thinks).

This is the kittens' mother. We call her "Momma Cat." She's only temporarily staying on the farm. Once the babies are old enough, she and the babies will all go to new homes.

The Savage Beast. Maisy was once my cat, but she didn't like Boston that much, since she couldn't get out of the house. Now, she only comes in to eat; she normally sleeps in the barn.

This is Molly. Molly was a rescue. One of my Dad's tenants abandoned her in their apartment, so my Dad brought her home. She's incredibly skittish, but has taken up the hobby of beating up Maisy whenever they're around each other.

This is Lilly. She was also a rescue. She spends every night sitting on my Dad's lap while he watches tv. Lilly also enjoys spending her nights in the hay loft.

Jazz (left) and Murphy (right) spend their days grazing on the farm. Both are extremely friendly horses. As soon as you approach the fence, possibly with a treat or not, they come running. They don't miss any meals!

Here's one of the ten or so ducks on the farm. They're my Dad's prized children. My parents' first summer in Kentucky, the neighbor's dog came over and killed a few of their ducks. My Dad was so upset that he researched that it would be legal for him to shoot the dog if he caught the dog killing one of his ducks again. And yes, in Kentucky, if an animal is killing your livestock, you can kill them legally.

Here's Fred checking on the baby ducks. Unfortunately, something snuck onto the farm last night and ate all the babies.

Here are some of the duck babies. Three were born on the farm and three were born in captivity, in a hatchery. Every spring, my parents enjoy the hatching of several new ducks. Unfortunately, every spring the ducks suffer natural selection as wild animals sneak onto the farm at night and eat some of them.

My parents also have a pond, that is full of fish. Pictured is a large carp and a small cat fish to the right. The carp have recently started coming up at night, when we throw fish food into the pond.

We've arrived!

2009-05-24T17:20:00.000-04:00

20 hours of driving, 1050 miles and no sleep means we have arrived in Kentucky. We left Manchester, NH at 5:45 pm on Wednesday. We drove straight, except stopping for gas and snacks until 4:15 am when we both really needed a nap. At that point, we had driven 630 miles. So we pulled into a 24-hour gas station in West Virginia and snuggled up for an hour nap. The gas station was a little sketchy but the nap was much needed; afterward, we were refreshed for finishing the trip.

We drove most of the trip and following morning without incident. About 100 miles into Kentucky and 100 miles from my parents, I got pulled over. The cop claims I was going 78 in a 65, but so wasn't everyone else. He just figured he'd pick out the MA plate. So after about 15 minutes on the side of the road, he gives me a form informing me that I am "violator." I have no idea what this means. There is no fine to pay; you have to call the "violator's office." After that we got off the highway and went straight to the liquor store, because I was a little pissed. I remained angry for the rest of the trip, especially since I have only ever had one speeding ticket and that was 4 years ago in the MA pike tunnel in MA.

We finally arrived at my parents house at 1 pm on Thursday. We went straight to the pool, upon arriving and began 3 days of complete relaxation.

During the trip, we played a lot of word games and crosswords, listened to Dane Cook, laughed a lot and discussed all life's current quandaries.

Lois spent a few days enjoying the Kentucky life and laying by the pool for hours on end. She left this morning to fly back home. I am immensely grateful to her for driving with me to Kentucky; without her, it would have taken much longer for me to get here. Below are some pictures from the road trip, including a lot of signs of odd names from West Virginia cities.

Here's Lois driving through the horrible NY traffic at about 9 pm on Wednesday.

This is Big Otter, West Virginia. I just thought it was an odd name.

And we've arrived in Kentucky!

Leaving in a Gold Hyundai...

2009-05-19T23:38:00.000-04:00

Tonight, I packed up my car, beside some last minute items I'll put in tomorrow morning. I don't think much else will fit in it beside me and Lo; I've packed it to the max.

Tomorrow, I have class until 4 pm and then I'll head to NH to pick up Lois. At about 6 pm tomorrow evening, the trip officially begins!

First Blog Ever

2009-05-15T09:25:00.000-04:00

Ok so I'm very new at blogging, so bear with me. My life has recently been turned up side down and after emailing a good friend my life update, she suggested a blog, so why not!

Here goes: its May 15, 2009. I am packing up my life's precious treasures to put in storage for a few months. I am moving out of the apartment that I have shared with my boyfriend, of about 4 years, to go live with my parents in Kentucky, not to mention we've also recently broken up. What prompted such a drastic move you should ask? I failed the bar.

Back in February, after studying my ass off for weeks, I took the MA bar exam. A two-day exam that is physically and mentally taxing on your body. I wasn't sure I aced it but with all the support from my friends, I knew I must have done well. I did well enough that I was 3 points from passing. I've been a little mad at the world since I found out I was only 3 points off.

Once I got the results, I knew I had to do something different. After I got over the initial shock of the bar failure, I got to work on making a plan for myself. I spent a lot of time talking with friends, family, and a few select others. In order to be successful on this bar, I needed to be somewhere that I would be completely supported by others (because I wasn't the first time around), where I had nothing to worry about but myself and studying for this bar. My parents were really pushing me to come stay with them, so I made the best decision I could: I was moving to Kentucky.

On a side not, but a rather important one: Prior to my bar results, I became aware that my relationship with Matt wasn't headed in a good direction. So I broke up with him. Its not as easy as I'm writing it to be but the short version is that I broke up with him because we just weren't a match for each other.

So in a few short days, I'll be packing up some clothes and books in my car, driving to pick up Lois (my best friend in life), and making the 1,000 mile drive to the Blue Grass state. I'll return to Massachusetts when I find a place to live and a job. I'll continue to make updates on the happenings in Kentucky, as this will certainly be a life experience.